I hope they always look at each other so adoringly

What will the future hold for these two? I am so excited to find out. I wonder what my life would be like without my sisters and I am so glad that Paige and Ainsleigh will always have each other.

This weekend we put the Christmas tree up with our big helper, Ainsleigh, while Paige slept. Ainsleigh really enjoyed it this year and had fun going through the ornaments and hearing the stories behind them. It's been a really nice, long, relaxing weekend. Much of it spent at home with our beautiful new baby, but I'm glad we could do that, especially on a snowy day like today. We were all pretty excited and surprised to open the curtains and see all the snow already settled. We're really a family of four now and it is a little crazy to think that we are responsible for these two beautiful little girls. I am thankful for so much this year, especially when I look at Paige and watch her sleep so peacefully unaware of how long we have waited for her and prayed for her safe, healthy arrival. She has no idea what a miracle she is to all of us. I guess that calm feeling is spreading to each one of us and I am really thankful for that most of all.

she's here!

Paige is here! I know, it is kind of old news, well two-week-old news, but this is the first opportunity I've had to write it out. It was the most amazing experience and it already seems like it was so long ago. All the worries and concerns, wondering if I'd end up with another c-section or if my vbac (vaginal birth after caesarean) would be successful and safe, are over and it was just more than I could have even planned for it to be. Tuesday, November 11th my sister Meghan had come to visit. We made soup and coffee and sat and talked while the kids played. I was having contractions throughout the day, but it was so nice and calm. Really the perfect day to go into labor.

It was 4 days before my due date and I had started to believe it would be awhile before Paige would decide to come. Meghan got ready to go shortly after Tim got home from work at 5: 30. But, as she got ready to get her coat on, I stood up and walked into the dining room and felt a little gush. I was convincing myself that I just peed my pants a little (pregnant women do that...or so I've heard) but then it happened again and again. Meghan, Tim and I packed my things as we called family and then headed to the hospital around 6:30. It was so perfect that Meghan was there. We said goodbye to Ainsleigh who was totally preoccupied with playing with her cousins, she didn't seem to understand what was happening no matter how much we had prepared her for it.

We got to the hospital, I stepped out of the jeep, and my water completely broke, soaking my pants. It was a little embarrassing walking into the hospital that way, but I think everyone understood! We were all checked into our room and ready to settle in for a long night at around 7:30. My wonderful midwife called and said she'd be on her way in about an hour. My contractions really picked up right before she got there and I was in active labor. I am just so glad that I had her and I sort of doubt that I would have had the experience I did without her. She stayed the entire night and talked TIm and I through each contraction. It was the most pain I've ever experienced, but by 11:30, just a few short hours later, it was over and my daughter was in my arms, safe and healthy. My parents were in the room the entire time, my Dad snuck behind the curtain when I'd get checked and when I pushed. My midwife was so surprised at how big Paige turned out to be and so was I. Tim was really great. He took the midwife's instructions well and rubbed my back as I cried and screamed, or breathed loudly(!) in the shower and in the bed. When it was time to push, it was really neat to have everyone there encouraging me because I honestly didn't believe I could do it at that point. I did have an epidural right before I started pushing, but I still felt everything. I think it might have taken the edge off the contractions, but not by much. Really though, I wouldn't change anything. It somehow makes me feel really strong and proud of what I accomplished and I will never have to wonder what it all feels like. Tim wasn't into cutting the cord, so my midwife called my Dad over and told him to do it. I think Dad is really proud that he played a part in everything. I can't believe my labor was so short. It was one of the best experiences of my life and I hope I never forget it.

It was all so peaceful, even with the pain. It felt like I was among people who loved me, wanted to encourage me, and were as excited to meet Paige as I was. I am so glad for that comfortable environment in which to welcome this third baby. It was nothing like the sterile, surgical environment we had with Addie and we are so glad to have made the new, joyful memories we have made. It was such a lesson in God's faithfulness. My midwife laid Paige on my stomach the second she was born, and I got to to hold her and cuddle her as they cleaned her up, then breastfed her right away. I'll never forget that feeling as I sat there looking into her little eyes for the first time, comforting her after the trauma of being born-the first of many comforts, touching her little back and thinking about how much she looked like Ainsleigh, the dark wavy hair, the brow, the sweet little pink lips. She is here, she is sweet and calm, she is so loved already and we are all just ecstatic!

passing the time

I'm pretty sure I've mentioned this before, but I'm really tired and ready to have this baby. Since she seems to want to stay put, we've been trying to pass the time doing as much to keep Ainsleigh occupied as I can manage. Yesterday we went to a Halloween party with our playgroup. Ainsleigh was really happy to be running around, playing hide and seek under the table, and just generally going a little crazy with other kids. That was BEFORE she even had any candy.


She was very focused making Halloween houses with bean ghosts. This was right up her alley.


She begged to hold the baby for the group photo and it is all she has talked about since. I just can't wait to see her with Paige. She really is gentle but it must be a baby's instinct to look worried when an anxious four year old is holding them. I remember Addie looking the same way!


Ainsleigh and "the other Paige." They play really well together, they're both four!


And one final picture of the two of us with the baby is still yet to be born. It took everything Ainsleigh had to stop playing and pose with mommy. She had a really good day but its amazing how little it takes to wear me out these days!

getting there

Well, I'm 37 weeks and three days. This baby can come any day! Ainsleigh has been waking up each morning and saying "Good Morning baby Paige! How are you doing this morning?" I'll be walking down the hall and she'll just run up and hug my tummy to tell the baby she loves her. It's so sweet. I broke down and let Tim take some pictures. It's something I don't want to forget.


Despite feeling pretty tired lately, I did manage to help Ainsleigh carve her pumpkin. She drew her own design on the pumpkin. She said, "I want two hearts for eyes, a triangle nose, and a mouth that goes...(makes face with 'oh no' expression)."


We went to "Boo at the Zoo" on Saturday. I decided Ainsleigh needed to do something fun after being pretty cooped up all week. She went as Barbie the Island Princess, from one of her favorite movies. She loved it, but wow, it was cold out!




And finally, she drew this last week for Daddy to take to work. I had gone out with some friends and when I got home, she came running up to me to show me her drawing of "Daddy at work, waving out the window at us!" It was so cute, I had to seriously stifle my laughter, she's so sensitive lately about being laughed at. But this was too much! Note the shadow at the bottom of the building. She puts this on all of her drawings, underneath the figures.


That's all I have to report. Hopefully next time it will be an introduction to our newest little family member. Hopefully!

it's still pretty sweet.

It's funny how, when she's sleeping, Ainsleigh's little face looks so much like it did when she was a sleepy baby. We had to get up early this morning to drop Tim off at work and I think it caught up with her this afternoon. She crawled up next to me on the couch and fell right asleep. The days of naps have long passed us by, although I could definitely use them lately! I just wanted so badly to snuggle her up close (how could I not, seriously...look at that face!), but this pregnant condition is making that harder and harder. It will be so nice to have my normal self back and be able to cuddle both these girls up close.





I haven't posted new photos lately, so here are a few to recap what we've been up to. She did some pumpkin painting last week, tried on Daddy's socks last Sunday and thought that was pretty hilarious, and the last picture is from the day we went to the swimming pool with cousins Eden and River. She's been doing this odd poses lately that kind of look like she's making gang signs and she thinks it is so funny. Almost every picture has some weird hand pointing thing going on.




We're having fun spending our last few weeks together, just the two of us but I have a feeling that it will be pretty fun to share these things with baby sister too.

two months

Exactly two months from today, baby girl #3, baby Paige as we call her around here, is expected to arrive. We're starting to feel pressure to get ready. We've got the crib up in Ainsleigh's room. Ainsleigh walked in and saw it and said excitedly, with her hands on her cheeks, "It's like a dream come true!" She just can't wait much longer. I have her baby quilt made and now I just need to get baby clothes out. I'm ready to be not pregnant but not quite ready for the baby to be here in terms of having everything out and ready. No diapers, no wipes, no clean bottles, no baby blankets ready other than the quilt, no clothes ready. The carseat is out but that is by accident! However unprepared I am in those terms, I am completely prepared to finally hold this girl in my arms and know she is here safely.

We had an appointment last week and my midwife seemed really surprised at how large the baby felt, which means my uterus is all the way up to my rib cage already. It's a little odd to hear your midwife say, while pushing in on your stomach to feel the baby, "Oh Steph" repeatedly! She thinks Paige has just had a growth spurt. Not much fun for me but she is really active and its nice to be able to feel her constantly moving around and know she is okay.

My midwife wanted to make sure I was tested for gestational diabetes that day, to make sure the baby isn't big for the wrong reasons. I passed thank goodness, but something funny happened after I took the test. We were walking out to the car and Ainsleigh goes, "Mommy, maybe you can get one of those things and you can test at home and it can fit in your purse because its only the size of an ipod." I wasn't really listening at first but then I realized that she was describing a diabetes tester. I asked her where she heard about that and she said from tv. Yeah, we must watch way too much when my daughter can describe an insulin tester. I can't believe she was paying that much attention to even know what my test was for. I guess I shouldn't be too surprised. Ainsleigh doesn't miss much.

So we are a little concerned about the baby being big, but I guess God has a sense of humor. We spent weeks worrying that Addie was too small and now we'll spend weeks worrying that Paige is too big! I even caught Tim laughing at me yesterday when I tried to pick something up off the floor and stood up with baby belly hanging out of my shirt. He tried to cover it up at first by asking if I needed some new clothes that fit, but finally laughed and said, "Wow, I think we're going to have a big baby!" Yeah, so I'm feeling real attractive right now. It's worth it for the baby to be healthy, it just isn't very comfortable and I'm really looking forward to being me again. I'm not one of those people who love being pregnant. Not at all. This is definitely the largest my belly has ever gotten but then it is my third pregnancy and its hard to compare it with Addie, since she was so tiny. Tim also pointed out that Ainsleigh's routine prayer for the baby has changed over the last two months from being, "Jesus, we pray that this baby is healthy and strong" to being, "Jesus, we pray that this baby is BIG and strong." Maybe God is just answering Ainsleigh's prayers. We're trying to get her back to saying healthy, but she just can't leave "big" out.

We're starting non-stress tests this week every Monday and Thursday until the baby comes. My midwife wants to check on her because of a blood clotting disorder I inherited. I'm only a carrier so hopefully everything will be fine and we will just see these tests as an opportunity to listen to Paige roll around and get some reassurance that she's doing great! Keep us in your prayers, I know we're all getting a little anxious as the time gets closer and any testing makes me apprehensive. I'm anxious about going through baby clothes also and all the Addie memories they will provoke. It is exciting though. It's just a matter of time now!

"It's not even the moon science."

This was Ainsleigh's response to Daddy's complaint that McDonald's just couldn't get his breakfast order right. "It's not even the moon science."

I guess that's one way of saying, "It's not like its rocket science."

It tooks us awhile to figure that one out! Moon science. It's kind of like the other day when, out of the blue, she tells me, "Mommy, the big bear is part of the little dipper constellation, right?!"

Maybe Astronomy is in her future?