Ainsleigh has some news!

I love my Ainsleigh. She is a very smart, outgoing, ambitious little girl. She has had some big things happen in her life, some that were wonderful, and some that were very difficult, and some that were a little of both. Tim and I have struggled lately, trying to decide what is best for her. I have been homeschooling and it has been wonderful and easy. Her idea of fun has always been reading, drawing, and learning so it isn't hard to get her interested in actual schoolwork. She is already reading basic words, and can tell you all about silent "e" and how it can change the sound of a word.

But things have been hard at home. We've got a few stressful situations going on and a baby sister that takes up a lot of my time and I have felt distracted. I have prayed about what to do and for the wisdom to know what is best. Not what I think is best, or what other people tell me is best, but what will be most beneficial for Ainsleigh.

Today we woke up just like any other day. I decided to take the girls for a walk. I mentioned to Ainsleigh that maybe we would visit the school and arrange for a visit maybe next week. As we walked, I prayed that God would give me wisdom and discernment so that I would know if it would be a good place for Ainsleigh to grow and learn. We walked in to find a very laid back environment. We were able to go out for recess and meet lots of kids. We stayed for reading time and library time, PE, and milk time. Paige was a big hit! Then I left, and let Ainsleigh finish out the day. The kids were very friendly and welcomed her so immediately! So tomorrow she will go again!

I'm still not sure if this is the right thing or not but it isn't in cement. We can always homeschool again. I have loved our time learning together, and I realized that this doesn't mean that it ends. But maybe this will give Ainsleigh time away from the stress at home and she will grow, make friends, and encourage her classmates.

I mentioned to the teacher that I would be willing to come in and help anytime if she needed me. She seemed open to that. Or maybe she thinks I'm sort of a hovering parent. Hmm...

Well, I like to think of it as "involved." And I plan to be just that. Actually, very involved. Hello Alwood Elementary!

baby steps

Poor Ainsleigh. I do take movies of her too. She actually just wants to be the one behind the camera these days. Paige has been neglecting crawling in favor of her new favorite thing to do; walking behind Ainsleigh's old mail cart toy. She is doing so well. She gets mad and grunts when she gets stuck and needs help turning around, but giggles when she sees us watching her and clapping for her. We've all agreed that she is the goofiest Boniger child yet. Ainsleigh has the title for cleverly funny (even if she doesn't mean to be) but Paige is goofy. The two of them together though, now that makes me really smile.

Paige's current vocabulary

da = daddy

ma or mum mum = mommy

ahh ma = Ainsleigh (first thing in the morning she lunges for Ainsleigh to wake her up yelling this. At night she yells it at her in the dark, like she's trying to keep her awake.)

ba = Bye! This is often accompanied by a wave which she stares at, astonished that she can make her hand bend like that. (she also yells "Ba!" when she sees a phone or when I hang up after a conversation)

haaaa = hi, also accompanied by a wave

nom nom = "Give me that food right now, mom!" Gets louder the longer she has to wait.

almost forgot...

AH! AH! = When reaching for something she can't seem to get by herself.

hot air balloon launch

Dear Ainsleigh,

Five years ago today...

I had no idea what it would be like

to cuddle you close

or be cuddled by you.

To hold your little hand in mine

and watch it grow.

To see you take your first steps

and hear your little voice

change from that of a 2 year old

to that of a quite eloquent little 5 year old.

I could not imagine

the attention span you would have.

That you could listen

all day

to the same book

but already have it memorized

after the first reading.

I didn't know that you

would be a fabulous little artist

that you would be happy

spending your days

with nothing but a notepad and a pencil.

Or that you would sit by my side

day in and day out

as we took care of a little baby

not meant for this Earth.

And that you would comprehend that.

And love her with all of your heart. Still.

When you were just two.

But then, when you were four,

you would welcome

another baby sister

who you would love with all of your heart

and want to name smileyface

or orange minge.

And who you would make giggle.

Like no one else could.

How could I know

that you would love to dance,

to sing, to pet every dog you see?

Or that you would need

to sit by my side

every morning

and drink your milk

before your day could really start.

And you would have

computer skills unmatched

by anyone your age.

You would make your

Daddy so proud.

And that you would
love to cook.

To go to starbucks

and color with mommy.

That you would be so happy

in those little moments.

I didn't know

that I could look

at anyone

and love them

so

much.

With my whole heart.

You are a very cool

fascinating

smart

beautiful

confident

brown-eyed girl.

Five years ago I had no idea

what I had been missing all those years before.

Happy 5th Birthday my daughter!

Change...

Things around here are changing. Paige is really growing, eating solids, rolling herself wherevershe wants to go, grabbing whatever she wants, and making noises that sound a little more like real talking. But most of all, Ainsleigh is growing up. She's really ready for kindergarten now. She tells people, "The next time I go to school, it won't just be for round-up. It will be all day long, like real school."

In the past month, she has gotten her ears pierced, rode her bike down a big hill, feet held out over the pedals with no fear. She has been a big help to me, an entertainer to her baby sister. I've watched her at playdates, helping the smaller kids and talking to them with gentleness. She isn't perfect, but she is really maturing. It is happening a little too fast.

That is why, two days ago, when I mentioned that maybe it would be nice if she cut her hair a little shorter for summer, I wasn't actually prepared for her to agree. Then, when it came time to make that cut, I just couldn't do it. But she wasn't backing down. "It's okay Mommy, just do it. It will grow back."

I suppose it will grow back. I put on a brave face and told her it would probably be long by her birthday. But she has no regrets. Daddy was a little sad to see her long hair gone too. It is really growing on us now. It bounces with her.

hello sun!

Welcome back warm weather! We have spent everyday this week outside, with me being leery of sunburn. Fortunately, the only damage is some rosy cheeks. Ainsleigh tans. But the creamy white, nearly translucent baby skin worries me. Today I stood with baby Paige asleep in the sling, enjoying the cool breeze blowing against her sweet cheeks and the spaces between her body and mine, watching Ainsleigh laugh while she played with the other kids spraying themselves with water. Getting soaked, but not caring a bit! It brought back memories for me and I hope that these are the memories she has someday too; summer days of playing at the park, blowing bubbles, swinging so high, and drenching herself in the cool spray of water on a warm day. Not time wasted on worrying.